Summary of How to Accept That You Have No Sense of Humor: 11 Tips
- Do people with anhedonia laugh?
- Can a person be described as humorous?
- What does it mean if you can’t stop laughing?
- What is irony and Humour?
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AI Overview
Accepting that you have a different or developing sense of humor—or even that you are a serious person—can be freeing rather than a limitation. It is important to remember that a sense of humor is not a defining characteristic of your worth or intelligence
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Here is how to accept and, if desired, navigate life with a different perspective on humor:
1. Acceptance and Self-Compassion
Validate Your Own Style: You may not find the same things funny as others, and that is fine. Trying to force yourself to be funny or to laugh at things you don’t find amusing can feel unnatural.
Let Go of the Pressure: Stop judging yourself for not meeting a standard of humor you have imagined. You are valid as you are.
Be Authentic: If you are a serious person, share that authenticity rather than putting on a, often unconvincing, “funny” facade.
Reframe “No Sense of Humor”: Instead of viewing it as a deficiency, recognize it as a different personality trait, perhaps one that is more introverted or focused on deeper, more intellectual topics.
2. Navigating Social Situations
Learn to Smile: If you don’t find something funny but want to be pleasant, you can simply smile or acknowledge a joke without needing to laugh loudly.
Admit You Don’t Get It: It is perfectly fine to say “I don’t get it” if a joke flies over your head.
Be Kind Instead of Funny: If humor isn’t your strength, lean into kindness, compassion, and being a good listener.
Find Your “People”: Surround yourself with individuals who share your perspective, or who accept you as you are without demanding you “lighten up”.
3. If You Want to Develop a Sense of Humor
Treat it as a Muscle: Humor is a skill, not just an innate ability. You can cultivate it by reading comics, watching comedy, or listening to funny podcasts.
Laugh at Yourself: Try to find the humor in your own mistakes rather than getting embarrassed. This reduces tension and makes you more approachable.
Force a Laugh (Sometimes): Forcing a laugh, even when alone, can help “exercise” your laughing muscles and eventually make it feel more natural.
Watch Comedy: Immersing yourself in comedy, such as stand-up specials, can help you understand the reasoning behind why things are considered funny.
Potential Underlying Factors
If this lack of humor feels new or distressing, it may be worth considering if it stems from:
Depression/Anxiety: A loss of enjoyment (anhedonia) can lead to a more muted, serious, or cynical outlook on life.
Stress: High levels of stress can make it difficult to find the lighthearted side of life.
Physical Factors: Poor sleep quality can reduce your sense of humor.
Disclaimer: If you feel this is a sign of depression or a sudden, negative change in your personality, consider reaching out to a mental health professional.
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This article was co-authored by Susan Pazak, PhD and by wikiHow staff writer, Eric McClure. Dr. Susan Pazak is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. With more than 21 years of experience, she specializes in treating adolescents and adults with psychological issues using cognitive behavioral therapy, symptom reduction skills, and behavior modification techniques. She has been featured in numerous media outlets and shows, including “My Strange Addiction”. Dr. Pazak holds a BA in Psychology with a minor in Communications from The University of Pittsburgh, an MA in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University, and a PhD in Clinical Psychology from Alliant International University.
There are 14 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 143,676 times.
If you feel like you don’t have a sense of humor, you may want to think again. People naturally have an innate ability to find things humorous, and it’s likely that you just haven’t found the right brand of humor for you yet. But even if you actually don’t have a sense of humor, that’s okay too, and we’re here to help! In this article, we’ll break down how you can cultivate your sense of humor, deal with social situations where you want to be funny, and learn to accept who you are.
Things You Should Know
- Take the pressure off and don’t judge yourself for not meeting whatever imagined standard of humor you have. You’re perfect the way you are.
- Immerse yourself in comedy by watching funny movies and hanging out with funny people to naturally cultivate your sense of humor. Make sure to allow yourself to laugh in these situations.[1]
- Memorize a few jokes if you want a quick way to make people laugh in social situations.
- Remember, your sense of humor is not the sum of who you are. Everybody is unique and you’ve got nothing to be ashamed of.
- Read and study about how to adjust your attitude and release negative, bitter thoughts to learn to laugh again.[2]
Expert Q&A
Video
Tips
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about sense of humor, check out our in-depth interview with Fernando Campos.
References
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2021/05/stop-being-so-hard-on-yourself
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/200607/whats-your-humor-style
- ↑ Fernando Campos. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Expert Interview
- ↑ Fernando Campos. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Expert Interview
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.pmi.org/learning/library/developing-humor-skills-project-success-5908
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ Fernando Campos. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.00123/full
- ↑ https://theconversation.com/how-children-develop-a-sense-of-humour-77028
- ↑ Fernando Campos. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.wisdomtimes.com/blog/how-to-develop-a-sense-of-humor/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4255480/
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/insights/make-em-laugh-how-humor-can-be-secret-weapon-your-communication
- ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
- ↑ https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/insights/not-joke-cost-being-humorless
- ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-of-the-self/200809/the-path-to-unconditional-self-acceptance
- ↑ https://www.regain.us/advice/general/my-partner-hates-my-dry-sense-of-humor-what-should-i-do/
To accept that you have no sense of humor, try to remember that humor is totally subjective, and you’re not a bad person just because some people don’t think you’re witty or funny. Instead of focusing on what you’re not, try to embrace all of the things that you do like about yourself. You can pick up some new hobbies or teach yourself new skills to discover talents that you never knew you had. Additionally, if you’re interested in developing your sense of humor, you could try watching comedy shows and stand-up performances or listening to funny podcasts. For tips from our co-author, like how to be less critical of yourself, keep reading!